Out of habit and routine, I begin my day with a fresh cup of coffee (or two). I like it rich and strong, with the perfect amount of cream and sugar. While the coffee is brewing and my home is filling up with that comforting aroma, I tidy up the kitchen, and scroll through social media on my phone. If I’m feeling ambitious, I may do some quick exercises or stretches. Then I can enjoy that cup of warm goodness! After that first sip, I am alert, can think more clearly and am ready to go about my day.
I realize I am thrown off course if my mornings do not start this way. Unfortunately, our comfortable routines look a little different lately.
When this happens, we may respond to life with a not so great attitude. Stress and emotions can get in the way of communicating clearly. They can cloud our judgment and become overwhelming. We may take things personally. We may do or say things we are not proud of. We may not wake up in the best mood. We could be short-tempered and pessimistic. We may be irritable and negative. We may be unmotivated and procrastinate. Goals and creativity may not be our friends.
Perhaps loved ones are ill and we cannot visit them. Or maybe we are alone and stuck in our own thoughts, dwelling too long on our past, sitting in anger and regret, or festering in fear. Maybe we lashed out reactively or drank a little more alcohol than we should have the night before. Our lives have shifted from comfortable routines to the unknown.
If you can relate to any of these, I encourage you to be patient and forgiving with yourself, give yourself some grace during this time. When I think of the word grace, an image of a ballerina comes to mind, moving with ease, agility, poise and balance. Grace is defined as the exercise of love, kindness, mercy (having compassion and forgiveness) and favor (approval, liking and support). Don’t we all need a little of this? We are in unknown territory right now, our lives have shifted unexpectedly, we were not prepared for how to handle this on top of our usual daily struggles. We are all learning how to navigate through this time. We can be mean to ourselves, so remember that we are all perfectly human and make mistakes. So, in this moment, forgive yourself for not knowing, send love and support to yourself. You have permission to forgive yourself, extend that loving kindness within and move on with ease. Fill your cup with extra grace today!
AnnMarie Lehrer, APC, is an Associate Counselor at CHRIS Counseling Center-DeKalb. To schedule an appointment, please reach out to intakeccdekalb@CHRIS180.org.
